THE NEW YEAR

I FEEL LIKE CRAP TODAY! I AM NOT SURE WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME BUT I SURE DON'T FEEL GOOD AT ALL. I HOPE THIS HEADACHE WILL GO AWAY SOON. BECAUSE I CAN'T FUNCTION WITH THIS HEADACHE. I WANT TO GO BACK TO BED AND TRY AND SLEEP THIS OFF. OH WELLHERE I AM AT WORKING TRYING TO WORK THROUGH IT. NOTHING I CAN DO ABOUT IT THOUGH. I WILL JUST KEEP DOING WHAT I AM DOING AND NOT GIVE INTO THE PAIN.

I CAN'T BELIEVE THAT THIS YEAR IS OVER. IT WENT BY SO QUICKLY I AM NOT SURE WHERE IT WENT. I THINK BACK AND SO MUCH HAS HAPPENED THIS YEAR. I AM HOPING THIS NEXT YEAR WON'T BE AS STRESSFULLY AS THE PAST YEAR WAS. I DON'T KNOW IF I CAN DEAL WITH ANOTHER CRAZY YEAR. I AM HOPING FOR LESS DRAMA AND LESS PAIN. WHO KNOWS IT MAY NEVER HAPPEN BUT I WILL ALWAYS HOPE AND PRAY THAT IT WILL HAPPEN THIS YEAR.

I AM NOT SURE WHAT I AM GOING TO WORK ON FOR THIS YEAR. I KNOW THINGS I NEED TO DO AND I WILL TRY AND DO THOSE. WE ARE GOING TO TRY AND BE NICE TO PEOPLE MORE THIS YEAR. THAT IS THE MAJOR ONE AND THEN A FEW OTHER HEALTH RELATED THINGS THAT I NEED TO FIX AND I WILL. I FIGURE I WILL FIGURE OUT LIFE AS IT GOES. MAYBE I WILL WORK ON GETTING A DUCK THIS YEAR.

WELL I HOPE EVERYONE HAS A SAFE HOLIDAY.

ENJOY YOUR NEW YEARS CELEBRATIONS!!!

Resolving to Break an Addictive Habit?
5 key steps might make it easier to start 2009 with less dependency.
By Kevin McKeever
TUESDAY, Dec. 30 (HealthDay News)—No matter the addiction—drugs, gambling, shopping, smoking, alcohol or more—people who want to kick their habit in the new year might find help in a new Harvard University publication.
"Overcoming Addiction: Paths toward recovery" offers guidance for breaking unwanted addictive habits. The advice applies universally, because what all addictions have in common, the Harvard experts say, is the way the brain responds to pleasurable experiences.
To break the pattern, it recommends the following steps to increase the chances of success:
Seek help and create a support network. Get input, advice and support from peers as well as professionals. Start with your doctor or a community mental health center for advice, a plan and—if necessary—medication to help with the break.
Ask family, friends and co-workers for encouragement and backup.
Set a quit date. Some people find it helpful to choose a significant date—a birthday or anniversary, perhaps.
Change your environment. Removing reminders and temptations from your home and workplace can make the break easier. For example, ridding the home of alcohol, bottle openers and wine or drink glasses might help a person trying to stop drinking. Don't let others bring reminders into the home. And, if necessary, break relations with people who enable your condition.
Learn new skills and activities. Find something to replace the addiction and help conquer urges. Many people find that exercise is a good substitute activity to help fight temptation.
Review your past attempts at quitting. Note what worked, what didn't and what might have led to falling back into old habits. Then, make appropriate changes.

I WILL NEVER GIVE A MAN CONTROL OF ME AGAIN. . .

WELL IT IS GETTING EASIER EACH DAY. THE HURT IS GOING AWAY AND BEING REPLACED BY ANGER. ANGER IS SOMETHING I CAN DEAL WITH. I WILL SURVIVE THIS AND I KNOW THAT. IT WILL BE HARD AT TIMES BUT I WILL SURVIVE AND I WILL MAKE IT THROUGH THIS. IF I AM MEANT TO BE WITH SOMEONE HE WILL FIND ME AT SOME POINT AND IF NOT OH WELL. I CAN AND WILL SURVIVE THIS LIFE ALONE OR WITH SOMEONE. I WILL FIGURE THIS ALL OUT AND SOMEDAY I WILL BE BACK TO WHO I WAS BEFORE THE MARRIAGE. IT WILL TAKE TIME BUT I WILL GET THERE. I HAVE ALWAYS BEEN INDEPENDENT IN LIFE AND I PLAN ON GETTING BACK TO THAT. I CAN'T LIVE MY LIFE DEPENDING ON OTHERS BECAUSE THEN I AM ALLOWING THEM HE POWER TO HURT ME. I DON'T WANT TO GIVE PEOPLE THE POWER TO HURT ME ANYMORE. THERE ARE STILL A HANDFUL OF PEOPLE THAT HAVE THE POWER TO HURT ME BUT I TRUST THEM NOT TO USE WHAT THEY KNOW AND HOW CLOSE THEY ARE TO ME AGAINST ME. I KNOW WHO AND WHAT I WANT IN LIFE AND IF I DON'T FIND IT THEN OH WELL I WILL ALWAYS DO ME. I CHANGED A LOT OF WHO I AM FOR A MAN AND I WON'T LET MYSELF DO IT AGAIN. I WILL NEVER GIVE A PERSON THE CONTROL OVER ME THAT I GAVE JOSH. I DID WHAT I SAID I WOULD NEVER DO AND I WON'T ALLOW IT AGAIN. IF SOMEONE DOESN'T LIKE ME AND MY MOUTH THEN THEY ARE WASTING THEIR TIME WITH ME. THIS IS ME AND IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT OH WELL IT IS YOUR LOSS NOT MINE.

THE CUBS ARE UP TO THERE USUAL STUFF. THEY ARE THE ONE THING LATELY THAT MAKES ME SMILE AND MAKES ME SEE THE GOOD IN LIFE. THEY DON'T JUDGE THEY LOVE UNCONDITIONALLY AND THAT IS WHAT I NEED. THEY ARE ALWAYS AROUND AND SEEM TO BE ABLE TO SENSE WHEN I AM HAVING A ROUGH DAY. I WILL BE SO SAD WHEN THEY FINALLY PASS AWAY. OH WELL ALL GREAT THINGS COME TO AN END. THEY CAN'T LIVE FOREVER AND ONCE THEY ARE GONE I AM DONE WITH CATS. IT HURTS TO MUCH WHEN YOU HAVE TO PUT THEM TO SLEEP. I DO WANT A DUCK THOUGH. I WANT A BOY DUCK THAT I WANT TO CALL BILL THE DUCK! WOW I CAN REALLY GET RANDOM AT TIMES!

MyHotComments

UPDATE ON ME. . .

I GUESS I SHOULD UPDATE EVERYONE ON WHAT IS GOING ON WITH ME. I AM DOING BETTER THAN I THOUGHT I WOULD BE DOING AT THIS POINT. I FIND THAT EACH DAY IT GETS EASIER AND EASIER TO DEAL WITH. I AM STILL HURTING INSIDE BUT IT ISN'T AS BAD AS IT WAS. I KNOW I WILL HAVE MY DAYS BUT I WILL SURVIVE IT. I WILL JUST GO OUT AND MEET PEOPLE AND SEE WHERE IT LEADS. I KNOW AT SOME POINT IT WILL GET BETTER AND I WILL BE BETTER OFF WITHOUT HIM. ALL HE DID WAS TRY AND MAKE ME FEEL BAD ABOUT WHO I WAS AND WHAT I DID. HE WASN'T UNDERSTANDING ABOUT ME AND HE JUST WANTED TO CONTROL ME. I WILL FIND SOMEONE WHO LOVES ME FOR ME AND LIKES WHO AND WHAT I AM. I WILL NEVER BE THE PERSON WHO DOESN'T SAY WHAT THEY FEEL. I WILL NEVER LET A MAN USE ME AGAIN. IT JUST TAKES DETERMINATION AND GOOD PEOPLE AROUND ME TO KEEP MY HEAD UP.

MORE BRITA PICTURES

THIS IS THE WHOLE FAMILY! I THINK THEY ARE SO CUTE TOGETHER!

DALIN WITH BRITA AND LIBBY. LISA TOLD ME THAT SHE STILL CARRYS A BLANK THAT I BOUGHT HER.

THIS IS WHAT HAS GOTTEN ME THROUGH THIS HARD TIME SHE WILL ALWAYS GET ME THROUGH. IT HELPS ME TO SEE HOW SHE IS!

THIS IS BRITA AND HER SISTER LIBBY!

WANTED TO POST THIS TO SHOW WHAT IS GETTING ME THROUGH. I HAVE TONS MORE THAT I WILL POST UP AS THE DAYS GOES BY. IT TAKES ALOT OF TIME TO GET THEM ALL UP HERE.

WELL WHO KNEW THAT BEING TOLD JOSH WAS LEAVING WOULD BE SUCH A RELIEF FOLLOWED BY SUCH HEART ACHE. I AM GLAD I KNOW WHAT IS GOING ON BUT I FEEL LIKE A FAILURE AND I FEEL ALONE. I FELL ALL ALONE IN ROOM FULL OF PEOPLE. I KNOW THAT TIMES HEALS ALL BUT IT HAS BEEN SUCH A HARD WEEK THAT IT IS ALL I CAN DO TO BELIEVE THAT I WILL SURVIVE THIS. I KNOW IT WILL HURT FOR A LONG TIME AND THE PAIN MAY NEVER GO AWAY. I AM SURE IT WILL EASE UP BUT I DOUBT IT WILL GO AWAY ALL TOGETHER. I AM ALWAYS GOING TO BE LEFT WITH THE WHAT IF'S. BUT THAT IS NO WAY TO LIVE. ALL I CAN DO IS HOPE AND TAKE ONE DAY AT A TIME.

I AM GOING TO GO PRIVATE ON THIS BLOG SO FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO WANT TO READ IT LEAVE YOUR E-MAIL ADDRESS AND I WILL SEND YOU AN INVITE. I WILL BE MAKING IT PRIVATE ON THE 25TH OF DECEMBER.

BRITA

I GOT TONS OF PICTURE OF BRITA YESTERDAY AND IT REALLY MADE ME SAD. I AM SAD ABOUT IT BUT CAN'T OVER HOW MUCH SHE LOOKS LIKE MY LITTLE BROTHER. SOME OF THE FACES SHE MAKES LOOK JUST LIKE FACES HE MAKES. WHEN I GET SOME TIME I WILL SCAN THEM IN AND PUT THEM UP FOR EVERYONE TO SEE THEM. I CAN'T BELIEVE HOW BIG SHE HAS GOTTEN AND IT IS HARD TO BELIVE SHE WILL BE FOUR IN JULY. THEY GROW UP SO FAST!

POWER OUTAGE

WELL THE POWER WENT OUT YESTERDAY NIGHT AND WAS OFF FOR QUITE AWHILE. I WAS GLAD THAT IT FINALLY CAME BACK ON SO THAT WE DIDN'T FREEZE TO DEATH LAST NIGHT. IT ALWAYS SUCKS WHEN THE POWER GOES OUT AT NIGHT IN THE WINTER, BUT THERE IS NOTHING YOU CAN DO WHEN IT DOES BUT TRY AND STAY WARM. SO THAT IS WHAT I TRY AND DO. THE CATS WERE ALL SORTS OF CRAZY CAUSE THEY DIDN'T KNOW WHAT WAS GOING ON. THEY KEPT ACTING LIKE THEY WANTED US TO TURN OUR LIGHTS ON. OH WELL WE ALL SURVIVED IT AND THAT IS ALL THAT MATTERS.

JOSH IS IN TOWN RIGHT NOW BUT I WON'T BE SEEING HIM. HE IS GOING TO TRY AND GET OUT OF HERE BEFORE THE STORM HITS THIS AFTERNOON. SO HE MIGHT AS WELL NOT BE HERE. OH WELL RIGHT HE NEEDS TO GET OUT OF HERE BEFORE HE GETS STUCK HERE BECAUSE THEY CLOSE DOWN I-80 IN WYOMING. SO HE HAS TO DO WHAT HE HAD TO DO TO MAKE MONEY. I AM OK WITH IT THOUGH. I CAN SURVIVE ANYTHING I HAVE DECIDED.

THIS IS HOW I FELT WHEN THE CHRISTMAS TREE AT WORK FELL OVER AND I HAD TO RE-PUT IT UP. THOUGHT EVERYONE WOULD LIKE TO SEE!

For all those men who say, Why buy a cow when you can get milk for free.Here's an update for you: Now days, 80% of women are against marriage,WHY? Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage.Men are like....

1. Men are like ..Laxatives ..... They irritate the crap out of you.

2. Men are like..Bananas . The older they get, the less firm they are.

3. Men are like Weather . Nothing can be done to change them.

4. Men are like ....Blenders You need One, but you're not quite sure why.5. Men are like .... Chocolate Bars .... Sweet, smooth, & they usually head right for your hips.

6. Men are like ...Commercials ..... You can't believe a word they say.

7. Men are like Department Stores .... Their clothes are always 1/2 off!

8. Men are like ...... Government Bonds .... They take so long to mature.

9. Men are like .....Mascara . They usually run at the first sign of emotion.

10. Men are like Popcorn .. They satisfy you, but only for a little while.

11. Men are like Snowstorms .... You never know when they're coming, how many inches you'll get or how long it will last.

12. Men are like ........ Lava Lamps ... Fun to look at, but not very bright.

13. Men are like Parking Spots All the good ones are taken, the rest are handicapped.

Aug 01, 2008
Two New Cases of PML Develop in People with MS Taking Tysabri
Biogen Idec and Elan Pharmaceuticals informed drug regulatory authorities about two new confirmed cases of PML in individuals who were taking Tysabri® (natalizumab) as a monotherapy (not in combination with other therapies). PML (progressive multifocal leukoencephalopathy) is a viral infection of the brain that usually leads to death or severe disability. Although FDA prescribing information includes a black box warning about the risk of PML, the three previous cases of PML that occurred in the context of clinical trials were in patients who had taken Tysabri in association with other immune-modulating or immune-suppressing medications.

Details: The companies held a conference call for prescribers and investors to provide details about the two cases, both of which occurred in European males. One had received Tysabri as a first line therapy because of the aggressive nature of his disease, and had been on Tysabri alone for 17 months before developing a slowly progressive focal twitching and weakness in one arm. Brain MRI showed a lesion that was not typical for MS but his spinal fluid was negative for JC virus until it was done a second time. He received five courses of plasma exchange and is currently stable and at home.

The second case has been reported to be a male who had received immune-suppressing and immune-modulating therapies in the past. He used Tysabri alone for 14 months before developing weakness on one side of the body. Despite treatment with steroids his symptoms progressed and included cognitive changes. His new MRI changes were not typical for MS, and spinal fluid was positive for JC virus. He is reported to be hospitalized and is slated to receive plasma exchange therapy.
Background: Tysabri is a laboratory-produced monoclonal antibody. It is designed to hamper movement of potentially damaging immune cells from the bloodstream, across the “blood-brain barrier” into the brain and spinal cord. It has been shown to be effective in reducing the risk of disability progression and exacerbations (relapses).
In the United States, the drug is available only through a risk management program called TOUCH, and is only available through doctors and infusion sites enrolled in the program. The program is designed to monitor patients for possible signs of PML and other serious opportunistic infections. Separate risk management plans are also in place in individual countries in Europe.
The companies recently reported that nearly 32,000 patients have been dosed with Tysabri. Of those, nearly 14,000 have been on the drug for at least 12 months, and 6,600 have been on the drug for at least 18 months. Up to this time there have been no previous confirmed cases of PML in patients using the drug as monotherapy.
Recent, small-scale studies supported by Biogen Idec have investigated the use of plasma exchange, a blood-cleansing treatment, to clear the bloodstream of Tysabri in the event of PML, for which there is no established therapy. The studies suggested that plasma exchange could indeed clear much of the drug from a person’s bloodstream, but it was not possible to determine experimentally whether that would lead to a reduction of PML symptoms.
Comment: These incidents of PML are unfortunate and disappointing, and we hope for the best possible outcomes for these individuals and their families. However, their occurrence is within range of the predicted frequency of PML cases, estimated by a published report and by the FDA, of approximately 1 in 1,000 people taking the drug. “We are encouraged that the risk management plans in place for early surveillance, such as the TOUCH program in the U.S., are doing the intended job of identifying possible cases of PML early so that patients can be treated quickly,” said John R. Richert, MD, executive vice president of research and clinical programs at the National MS Society . “It will be important to observe whether plasma exchange therapy in these new cases will have an ameliorating effect on their PML.”
These incidents highlight the need for individuals taking Tysabri to be sensitive to any occurrence of new, unusual symptoms and to contact their prescribing physician or infusion nurse immediately if they occur. Signs of PML may include any new or worsening neurological symptoms such as any changes in thinking, eyesight, balance, strength and other symptoms.
Tysabri is a registered trademark of Biogen Idec and Elan.
The National MS Society is proud to be a source of information about MS. Our comments are based on professional advice, published experience and expert opinion, but do not represent individual therapeutic recommendation or prescription. For specific information and advice, consult your personal physician.

BILL THE DUCK

I FEEL LIKE CRAP TODAY. TODAY IS DEFFINATELY A BAD DAY. I GUESS I AM BOUND TO HAVE THEM AT TIMES BUT I SURE WISH I WOULDN'T HAVE THEM. I JUST HOPE ONE DAY I WON'T HAVE BAD DAYS. I AM SO TIRED OF HAVING HEADACHES AND BEING SICK ALL THE TIME. I GUESS THOUGH GOD GAVE ME THIS BECAUSE OTHER PEOPLE COULDN'T DEAL WITH IT. I HAVE STARTED TO WONDER HOW MUCH I CAN REALLY DEAL WITH THOUGH BECAUSE THINGS KEEP GOING WRONG AND I AM RUNNING OUT OF PATIENCE DEALING WITH IT ALL. GUESS ALL I CAN DO IS KEEP TRYING TO DEAL AND HOPE I DO A GOOD JOB OF DEALING WITH IT ALL.

SO YESTERDAY AT WORK WE HAD A WEIRD THING HAPPEN. A DUCK DECIDED TO TAKE UP RESIDENCE IN OUR PARKING LOT FOR MOST OF THE AFTERNOON. I CALLED PEOPLE TO COME AND GET IT BUT THEY NEVER SHOWED UP AND HE WANDERED AWAY. I DID NAME THE DUCK HIS NAME IS BILL AND IT MADE ME WANT A PET DUCK. SO ONE DAY I WILL GET A PET DUCK. I LOVE ALL ANIMALS AND I DECIDED THAT I WANT A DUCK SO ONE DAY I WILL GET A DUCK FOR A PET! MY FAMILY THINKS I AM CRAZY BUT OH WELL I WILL GET A DUCK. MAYBE I SHOULD JUST GET A FARM AND THAT WAY I CAN HAVE LOTS AND LOTS OF ANIMALS. I HAVE DECIDED YOU CAN NEVER HAVE TO MANY ANIMALS!

SNOW

WELL IT FINALLY SNOWED AND THAT IS YUCKY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I HATE THE SNOW AND I HATE DRIVING IN IT. IT MAKES IT COLD AND YUCKY. I AM READY TO MOVE TO SOMEWHERE THAT IT DOESN'T SNOW. I HAVE DECIDED THAT I HATE SNOW AND THAT I HATE DRIVING IN IT, BUT AS LONG AS I AM HERE I HAVE TO DEAL WITH IT. SO I WILL DEAL WITH IT. I WILL STILL BITCH AND MOAN ABOUT IT BUT I WILL DEAL WITH IT. THAT IS ALL I CAN DO IS DEAL WITH IT AND DRIVE SAFE. THE CUBS DON'T LIKE SNOW EITHER. I KNOW THIS BECAUSE I TAKE THEM OUT AND PUT THEM IN THE SNOW. LOL I KNOW I AM A MEAN MOTHER BUT IT IS SO FUNNY TO WATCH THEM FREAK OUT WITH THE SNOW. I HAVE TO BE CAREFUL WITH ELINORE BECAUSE SHE IS SO SHORT SHE MIGHT GET LOST IN THE SNOW IF IT IS TOO DEEP.

MY HEAD IS BEING CRAZY TODAY. I FEEL LIKE IT IS GOING A HUNDRED MILES AND HOUR IN TEN DIFFERENT DIRECTIONS. SO I WILL PROBABLY START TO RAMBLE ON AND ON. I HATE IT WHEN MY BRAIN DOES THIS. I FEEL LIKE I CAN'T KEEP UP WITH WHAT IS GOING ON WITH MY HEAD AT TIMES. I TEND TO GET REALLY CONFUSED ON DAYS LIKE THIS BECAUSE I CAN'T FIGURE OUT WHAT IS REAL AND WHAT IS JUST IN MY HEAD. GUESS I JUST HAVE TO TRY HARDER TO CONTROL IT AND HOPE IT WILL GO AWAY. I HAVE NOTICED THOUGH THAT STRESS MAKES IT WORSE, AND I HAD ALOT OF STRESS YESTERDAY TO SAY THE LEAST. SO I HOPE MY HEAD WILL STOP AND IT WILL GO AWAY.

LET ME JUST START BY SAYING I HATE WINTER TIME. I HATE HOW COLD IT IS AND I ALSO HATE THE SNOW. I STILL DON'T KNOW HOW MY CAR WILL HANDLE IN THE SNOW AND I DON'T REALLY WANNA KNOW HOW MY CAR WILL HANDLE IN THE SNOW. MAYBE I WILL MOVE SOMEWHERE WHERE IT DOESN'T GET THIS DAMN COLD AND IT DOESN'T SNOW. I AM SO TIRED OF THE SNOW!

I FILLED MY CAR UP WITH GAS YESTERDAY NIGHT AND I WAS SHOCKED THAT I COULD FILL IT UP FOR $16. I AM SO GLAD THAT THE PRICES CAME DOWN. NOW I CAN AFFORD TO FILL MY CAR UP AND HOPEFULLY GET CAUGHT UP ON MY BILLS AND START SAVING MONEY AGAIN. WHO KNOWS THOUGH WITH MY DOCTOR BILLS LIKE THEY ARE I DON'T KNOW THAT I WILL BE ABLE TO SAVE ANY MONEY. I HAVE THE FEELING I WILL BE PLAYING CATCH UP FROM NOW ON. I DON'T THINK I WILL EVER BREAK EVEN. OH WELL I GUESS THAT IS ALL I CAN DO ANYMORE LOL IS TRY AND BREAK EVEN AND HOPE THAT I CAN AT LEAST STAY CAUGHT UP WITH EVERYTHING.

SO I AM STARTING TO FEEL A LITTLE BETTER NOT MUCH BUT A LITTLE SO THAT IS GOOD. HOPEFULLY I AM GETTING OVER THIS SO THAT I CAN HAVE MY NEXT INFUSION. NOT THAT I REALLY WANT MY NEXT INFUSION BUT I HAVE TO TRY AND HOPE THAT I GET BETTER. I AM NOT SURE IF TYSABRI IS RIGHT FOR ME BUT I HAVE TO TRY AND SEE WHAT HAPPENS. IF I JUST GIVE UP NOW I WILL ALWAYS HATE MYSELF FOR NOT GIVING A TRY. SO HERE WE GO TRYING IT ONE MORE TIME. IF I HAVE A REACTION THIS NEXT TIME I AM DONE FOR GOOD WITH IT AND WE WILL HAVE TO FIGURE OUT WHAT WE ARE GOING TO DO NEXT. THERE IS NOTHING OUT THERE THAT I KNOW OF TO DO IF THIS DOESN'T WORK. I WILL BE OUT OF OPTIONS SO LETS ALL PRAY IT GOES SMOOTHLY THIS TIME AND NOTHING GOES WRONG.

I AM TRYING THIS WHOLE STAY POSITIVE THING AND I THINK I AM DOING PRETTY WELL WITH IT MOST DAYS. I FIND MYSELF NOT THINKING ABOUT ALL THE BAD THINGS IN MY LIFE BUT TRYING TO FOCUS ON THE GOOD. EVEN THOUGH THERE ISN'T MUCH GOOD GOING ON LATELY. ALL I CAN DO ANYMORE IS TRY AND SEE ONLY THE GOOD AND HOPE THAT I CAN STAY POSITIVE AND GET THROUGH ALL THE TRIALS I AM HAVING. MAYBE ONE DAY IT WON'T BE AS HARD AS IT IS NOW. THAT IS ALL ANYONE CAN HOPE FOR THAT ONE DAY LIFE WON'T BE AS HARD AS IT HAS BEEN THE LAST FEW YEARS.

20 Questions Christmas Edition

1. Egg Nog or Hot Chocolate? Hot Chocolate can't stand egg nog

2. Does Santa wrap presents or just sit them under the tree? Depends on the size

3. Colored lights on tree/house or white? Colored

4. Do you hang mistletoe? Nope

5. When do you put up your decorations? Never if I could get away with it

6. What is your favorite holiday dish? Don't really have any

7. Favorite Holiday memory as a child? Dont really remember my childhood

8. Did you write letters to Santa? Once I think

9. Do you open a gift on Christmas Eve? Sometimes we did

10. How do you decorate your Christmas Tree? I never have had a tree of my own. I did decorate the one at work with my decorations

11. Can you ice skate? Nope not enough cordination

12. Do you remember your favorite gift? Nope

13. What’s the most important thing about the Holidays for you?Family and friends

14. What is your favorite Holiday Dessert? Used to be pies but now that I can't eat them I don't have one

15. What is your favorite holiday tradition? Don't have one

16. What tops your tree? A bow

17. Which do you prefer giving or receiving? Either doesn't matter to me

18. What is your favorite Christmas Song? I don't have one

19. Candy Canes? Nope they are gross I have never liked them

20. Do you feel Christmas is too commercialized? Yes!!!!!!!!!!!! When you see Christmas stuff in September you know it is to commercialized.

CHRIS AND LACHELLE

CHRIS AND LACHELLE TRYING TO TAKE A PICTURE FOR THE BACK GROUND OF HER NEW COMPUTER.

LACHELLE DOESN'T LIKE THIS PICTURE AT ALL. LOL I THOUGHT IT WAS CUTE SO I HAD TO POST IT.

CHRIS BEING CHRIS

THIS IS CHRIS AND LACHELLE BOTH IN UNIFORM. SHE JOINED THE NATIONAL GUARD TOO.

CHRIS AND LACHELLES MOM

I FIGURED I WOULD POST THEM UP SO THAT PEOPLE KNOW WHO I AM TALKING ABOUT WHEN I TALK ABOUT LACHELLE AND MY BROTHER.

WELL IT IS FINALLY FRIDAY AND I STILL FEEL LIKE CRAP. GUESS I WILL SPEND THIS WEEKEND SICK. THAT ALWAYS SUCKS CAUSE IT MEANS I AM NOT GOING TO GO ANYWHERE. GUESS THIS WAS BOUND TO HAPPEN I AM JUST MAD IT HAPPENED SO SOON. ALL I CAN DO IS TAKE VITAMINS AND STAY INSIDE UNTIL I AM BETTER. I JUST HOPE THIS WILL GO AWAY SOON SO I CAN GET MY NEXT INFUSION. I WILL BE SO MAD IF I HAVE TO RESCHEDULE IT. I DON'T HAVE TIME TO TAKE OFF OF WORK TO GET THE INFUSION. SO WE WILL SEE WHAT HAPPENS ON THE 26TH. ALL I CAN DO IS BE POSITIVE AND HOPE FOR THE BEST. I HOPE I WILL BE OK AND NOTHING BAD WILL HAPPEN THIS NEXT TIME.

JOSH AND I AREN'T REALLY DOING WELL ANYMORE. HE HASN'T TALKED TO ME FOR DAYS AND I DON'T SEE HIM TRYING TO CALL ME ANYTIME SOON. HE IS JUST DOING HIS USUAL THING. I AM JUST GETTING TIRED OF HIM ALWAYS DOING THIS UP AND DOWN THING. IT IS SURE GETTING OLD FAST. HE JUST DOESN'T SEEM TO GET HOW MUCH IT HURTS ME WHEN HE DOESN'T CALL OR TEXT ME. IT IS LIKE A SLAP IN THE FACE TO ME. IT MAKES IT SEEM LIKE HE DOESN'T CARE ABOUT ME AT ALL. I DON'T KNOW THAT HE WILL EVER GET IT. HE IS A MAN AND ALL MAYBE IF I IGNORE HIM FOR A COUPLE DAYS HE WILL UNDERSTAND WHAT I AM TALKING ABOUT. BUT THEN AGAIN HE IS A MALE AND HE MAY NEVER GET WHAT I AM SAYING OR TRYING TO GET HIM TO SEE.

THIS IS JUST SOME OF THE THINGS I FEEL TODAY! I SEEM TO GET SICKER AND SICKER AS THE DAYS GOES ON.

WELL THE GUYS AT WORK WON! I AM SICK AND I HOPE THEY ARE PROUD OF THEMSELVES. SO WE WILL SEE HOW LONG IT TAKES ME TO GET BETTER. WE ALL NEED TO PRAY THAT I AM BETTER BEFORE THE 26TH OF DECEMBER SO THAT I CAN GET MY NEXT INFUSION. I HATE BEING SICK. I GETS SO OLD SO QUICK AND I TEND TO NOT BE A NICE PERSON WHEN I AM SICK. I TRY AND BE NICE BUT IT NEVER SEEMS TO WORK FOR ME. IT SEEMS LIKE I ALWAYS END UP BEING A BITCH TO PEOPLE THAT ARE TRYING TO TAKE CARE AND HELP ME. I KNOW IT ISN'T RIGHT BUT I CAN'T SEEM TO CHANGE IT. I TRY EVERYTIME BUT IT NEVER SEEMS TO WORK. I GUESS THE ONLY THING I CAN DO IS KEEP TRYING AND ONE DAY I WILL SUCCEED AT IT I HOPE. ALL I CAN HOPE IS THIS PASSES QUICKLY!

I STILL HAVEN'T TALKED TO JOSH MUCH. I GUESS HE IS WAITING FOR ME TO FREAK OUT AND YELL AT HIM BUT I WON'T LET HIM GET TO ME LIKE THAT ANYMORE. I WILL AND I AM CHANGING HOW I REACT TO HIM. I WON'T LET ME GET THE BEST OF ME ANYMORE. I WILL BE IN CONTROL OF MYSELF. I WON'T LET HIM KNOW HE PISSES ME OFF AT TIMES. I KNOW I WILL SLIP UP AT TIMES BUT I KNOW IF I DO IT AS LITTLE AS POSSIBLE I WILL FEEL BETTER ABOUT MYSELF AND HOW I REACTED TO THE SITUATION. I HOPE ONE DAY HE WILL GET HOW HE IS AND GET HOW HE TREATS ME BUT I KNOW THAT MAY NEVER HAPPEN WITH HIM. I WILL ALWAYS HOPE IT DOES BUT I HAVE TO KNOW THAT IT MAY NEVER HAPPEN. I DON'T KNOW OF ANYWAY TO MAKE ME SEE IT. I KNOW YOU CAN'T FORCE ANYONE TO DO ANYTHING. I ALSO KNOW I CAN'T MAKE HIM SEE OR UNDERSTAND HOW HE MAKES ME FEEL WHEN HE ACTS LIKE HE IS ACTING NOW. I DON'T THAT ANYONE CAN MAKE HIM WAKE UP AND SEE HOW HE IS BEING. I GUESS IT IS SOMETHING THAT HE WILL HAVE TO SEE ON HIS OWN.

RANDOM THOUGHTS OF TODAY. . .

WELL THIS WEEKEND WENT REALLY WELL AND I AM NOT AS TIRED AS I USED TO BE. BUT NOW THAT I WANNA GO OUT I CAN'T BECAUSE OF THE MEDICATION. OH WELL RIGHT GUESS I HAVE TO DO WHAT I HAVE TO DO IN ORDER TO GET BETTER OR AT LEAST STABLIZE. SO I WILL FIGURE OUT WHAT TO DO WITH ALL MY TIME AND ENERGY. I MIGHT LOOK IN TO GETTING A TREDMILL AND START WALKING ON IT. WE WILL SEE I ALWAYS SEEM TO BE ABLE TO ENTERTAIN MYSELF. I NEED TO FIND HOBBIES THAT WILL KEEP MY BUSY BUT I AM NOT SURE THAT I HAVE EVER HAD ANY. I ALWAYS SEEM TO BE OK BUT NOW THAT I CAN'T GO OUT I AM NOT SURE WHAT I SHOULD DO. SO I JUST WALK AROUND THE HOUSE. MY LITTLE BROTHER IS TEACHING ME TO PLAY WORLD OF WAR CRAFT BUT I AM NOT SURE HOW I LIKE IT. I AM NOT VERY GOOD AT IT TO SAY THE LEAST. I GET BORED WITH IT REALLY FAST BECAUSE I KEEP DYING LOL. MAYBE ONE DAY I WILL GET GOOD AT IT AND NOT KEEP DYING ALL THE TIME, BUT THEN AGAIN MAYBE ME DYING ALL TJE TIME WILL KEEP ME FROM GETTING ADDICTED TO IT LIKE EVERYONE SEEMS TO GET WITH IT. I NEED TO START READING AGAIN I THINK THAT IS ALWAYS A GOOD HOBBY TO HAVE. I JUST FEEL BURNED OUT OF EVERYTHING RIGHT NOW.

JOSH AND I ARE IN OUR USUAL CYCLE AND HE DOESN'T WANNA REALLY TALK TO ME. SO THIS TIME I AM NOT LETTING IT GET TO ME. I AM SAYING OK IF YOU DON'T WANNA TALK TO ME THAT IS COOL AND I AM NOT EVEN REALLY FAKING IT. I AM ACTUALLY PRETTY MUCH OK WITH IT. I AM JUST NOT LETTING HIM GET A REACTION OUT OF ME ON ANYTHING. I THINK THAT ME NOT GIVING A REACTION IS MAKING HIM PUSH HARDER TO TRY AND GET ONE. ALL I KNOW IS I WON'T LET WHAT HE DOES UPSET ME TOO MUCH. I WILL BE ME AND DO ME AND IF HE WANTS TO TALK OR BE AROUND ME HE CAN AND IF NOT THEN THAT IS HIS LOSS. NOW DON'T GET ME WRONG I WANT THIS TO WORK BUT I CAN'T FORCE HIM TO TRY AND I CAN'T MAKE IT WORK ALONE. SO IT REALLY IS ON HIM THIS TIME. I WILL KEEP DOING WHAT HE ASKED ME TO DO AND IF THAT ISN'T ENOUGH THEN OH WELL. I WON'T TOTALLY STOP BEING ME FOR SOMEONE ELSE. I JUST WISH SOMEONE WOULD WAKE HIM UP AND MAKE HIM SEE WHAT HE IS DOING TO ME. I DON'T KNOW THAT HE GETS IT AT TIMES. EVEN THOUGH I AM TRYING NOT TO LET IT GET TO ME IT DOES AT TIMES AND IT MAKES ME FEEL BAD ABOUT THE WHOLE SITUATION.

THE CUBS ARE BECOMING MORE OF A MONSTER EVERYDAY. IT AMAZES ME HOW MANY THINGS THEY DO NOW JUST TO SEE IF THEY CAN GET AWAY WITH IT. WHEN I LIVED AT THE APARTMENT THEY NEVER GOT INTO THIS MUCH TROUBLE. I GUESS IT IS BECAUSE MY GRANDPARENTS JUST LET THEM DO WHATEVER THEY WANT TO DO. OH WELL IT IS THERE HOUSE AND IF THEY ALLOW IT WHO AM I TO STOP IT. WE FINALLY FIGURED OUT THAT I AM ALLERGIC TO ELINORE. WE AREN'T SURE WHAT IT IS BUT SHE MAKES ME ITCH SO BAD. THE FUNNY THING IS THE OTHER CATS DON'T MAKE ME ITCH SO WE AREN'T SURE WHAT IT IS ABOUT ELINORE. SO NOW I CAN'T PICK HER UP AND THAT MAKES ME SAD BUT SHE ISN'T GETTING NEGLECTED THAT IS FOR SURE. ALL MY GRANDMA DOES HALF THE DAY IS PET HER.

A DISGUSTING STORY

I HEARD THIS STORY ON THE RADIO THIS MORNING AND HAD TO POST IT. IT MAKES ME SICK THAT PEOPLE CAN ACTUALLY DO THESE THINGS TO PEOPLE. I WORKED AS A CNA AND COULD NEVER SEE DOING THAT, AND IF I KNEW SOME ONE WAS DOING IT I WOULD REPORT THEM.

Minn. teen girls charged in nursing home abuse
December 5th, 2008 @ 2:27am
ALBERT LEA, Minn. (AP) - Two teenage girls who worked at a nursing home have been charged with abuse, accused of taunting, spitting on and groping residents who suffered from Alzheimer's disease.
According to the criminal complaint, filed Monday, 19-year-old Brianna Broitzman and 18-year-old Ashton Larson laughed earlier this year as they spat in residents' mouths, poked and groped their breasts and genitals, and at times mocked them until they screamed.
Broitzman and Larson, who worked as part-time aides at the home, have been charged as adults.
Larson's father disputed the charges against his daughter in a statement issued to and read on NBC's "Today" show Thursday.
"Not all of the charges are as they appear. Much of this has been distorted by the news media," Michael Larson said in the statement.
"My daughter was doing nothing more than performing the duties of her job."
No one answered the phone Thursday morning at Broitzman's home. There was no information in court records on attorneys for either teen.
Four other teens who worked with them at the Good Samaritan Society were charged as juveniles for failing to report the incidents.
A total of eight teens were allegedly involved in the incidents, but there was no record of criminal charges being filed against two of them.
Broitzman and Larson are charged with assault, abuse of a vulnerable adult by a caregiver, abuse of a vulnerable adult with sexual contact, disorderly conduct and failing to report suspected maltreatment. All are gross misdemeanors.
If found guilty, Broitzman and Larson "most likely will face suspended jail sentences and probation, so they'd have the threat of jail hanging over them if they get in more trouble," Freeborn County Attorney Craig Nelson told the Star Tribune of Minneapolis.
The Minnesota Department of Health released a report in August showing that 15 residents with Alzheimer's disease or other dementia disorders were abused at the facility between Jan. 1 and May 1.
According to the complaint filed Monday, one of the aides said the group gathered at work or school to "talk and laugh about the incidents."
Mark Anderson, administrator at the Good Samaritan Society in Albert Lea, told WCCO-TV that the past few months have been difficult for the staff, the home's residents and their families.
"We are just really thankful that the proceedings are moving forward and hopefully can see some closure to this whole process," Anderson said.

BEING POSITIVE

I HAVE DECIDED THAT MY NEW GOAL IS TO BE MORE POSITIVE AND NOT TO STRESS AS MUCH. SO THAT IS WHAT I AM GOING TO TRY AND DO UNTIL I GET IT DOWN. MAYBE IF I AM POSITIVE ONE DAY MY LIFE WON'T BE AS DIFFICULT AS IT TENDS TO BE AT TIMES. I THINK EVERYONE NEEDS TO HEAR GOOD THINGS SOMETIMES AND I WANT TO BE THE ONE TO MAKE PEOPLES LIVES BETTER, BUT I NEED TO START WITH ME. SO MY GOAL IS TO GET ME WHERE I NEED TO BE AND THEN GO TO SCHOOL FOR SOCIAL WORK AND GO INTO ADOPTIONS. I WOULD LOVE TO HELP OTHER PEOPLE WITH ADOPTIONS BECAUSE I KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR THE BIRTH PARENTS AND I HAVE SEEN THE JOY THE ADOPTIVE COUPLE HAS. SO I WANT TO BE ABLE TO HELP GIRLS WITH IT. I THINK IT WOULD BE A VERY REWARDING PROFESSION. HOW REWARDING IT WOULD BE MAKES UP FOR THE LACK OF PAY THAT COMES WITH THE JOB.

JOSH AND I ARE DOING OK RIGHT NOW. SO I HOPE IT STAYS THAT WAY BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW I CAN DEAL WITH IT AGAIN. IF IT DOESN'T WORK THIS TIME WE ARE OUT OF OPTIONS. THIS IS THE LAST TIME WILL TRY AND MAKE IT WORK. IF IT DOESN'T THEN WE HAVE DONE ALL WE CAN DO AND WILL HAVE TO CUT OUR LOSSES. BUT I WILL HOLD OUT HOPE THAT IT WILL WORK AND THAT WE WILL BEAT THE ODDS. WE JUST HAVE TO WORK HARDER BECAUSE WE ARE APART ALLTHE TIME. I KNOW THAT IF WE TRY HARD ENOUGH WE CAN MAKE IT.

RANDOM THOUGHTS OF THE DAY

IT IS ALREADY WEDNESDAY AND I FEEL WARN OUT. IT HAS BEEN A REALLY LONG COUPLE OF DAYS TO SAY THE LEAST. IT SEEMS LIKE THEY WENT ON FOR FOREVER AND A DAY. IF IT HASN'T BEEN ONE THING IT HAS BEEN ANOTHER. IT COULD BE ME JUST TRYING TO GET CAUGHT UP FROM LAST WEEK WHICH IS A JOKE. I NEVER SEEM TO GET CAUGHT UP TO SAY THE LEAST. I JUST SEEM TO GET FARTHER AND FARTHER BEHIND. OH WELL GUESS ONE DAY I WILL GET IT ALL FIGURED OUT. MAYBE IF I TRIED WORKING ALL DAY I WOULD GET CAUGHT UP, BUT SOME DAYS I JUST CAN'T WORK ALL DAY. I SURE TRY BUT I JUST CAN'T DO IT SOME DAYS. I GUESS THE PHONES ALWAYS SEEM TO THROW ME OFF. THEY NEVER STOP SOME DAYS AND IT MAKES ME LOSS PATIENCE AND LOSE MY TRAIN OF THOUGHT. I MEAN TRYING TO WRITE THIS HAS TAKEN TWICE AS LONG AS IT SHOULD CAUSE OF THE PHONES. OH WELL IT IS MY JOB TO ANSWER THEM SO I HAVE TO DEAL WITH IT. I THINK THOUGH SOME DAYS I HAVE TAKEN ON MORE THAN I CAN HANDLE WITH ALL THE OTHER THINGS THAT I DO AT WORK. I JUST KEEP DOING MORE AND MORE BECAUSE I FEEL BAD IF I SAY I DON'T HAVE THE TIME TO DO IT. SO I JUST KEEP DOING WHATEVER THEY ASK OF ME. OH WELL THAT IS JUST ME ALWAYS HATING TO SAY NO TO ANYONE. I GET THAT FROM MY GRANDMA I THINK BECAUSE SHE NEVER SAYS NO TO ANYONE. IF YOU ASK HER TO DO SOMETHING THE ANSWER IS ALWAYS YES. SO MAYBE IT IS SOMETHING THAT I NEED TO WORK ON BUT I HATE SEEING PEOPLE DISAPPOINTED SO I JUST SAY YES. THAT WAY I DON'T LET THEM DOWN AND I DON'T HAVE TO FEEL BAD ABOUT IT ALL.

JOSH AND I ARE DOING OK. WE ARE BOTH TRYING SO WE WILL SEE WHAT HAPPENS. WITH US YOU JUST NEVER KNOW FROM DAY TO DAY WHAT IS GOING ON. ONE DAY IT IS GOOD AND THEY NEXT DAY IT SUCKS. I GUESS IF IT IS MEANT TO BE IT WILL HAPPEN AND IF NOT THEN IT WON'T. WHO KNOWS ANYMORE. I HAVE TAKEN THE VIEW OF "IF IT IS GOING TO HAPPEN IT WILL AND IF NOT THEN I AM GOING TO TRY AND NOT WORRY ABOUT IT". I DON'T HAVE THE PATIENCE TO DEAL WITH THINGS THAT JUST WON'T WORK. I DEAL WITH SO MUCH ANYWAY THAT I DON'T HAVE THE PATIENCE TO DEAL WITH THINGS I CAN'T CHANGE.

I BOUGHT TICKETS YESTERDAY TO GO SEE JEFF DUNHAM IN JANUARY. I AM SO EXCITED TO SEE HIM IT SHOULD BE A GREAT SHOW. I AM GOING TO GO WITH MY BROTHER AND HIS GIRLFRIEND AND HOPEFULLY JOSH IF HE MAKES IT HERE ON TIME. IF HE DOESN'T I WILL TAKE MISTI WITH ME SO THAT THE TICKET DOESN'T GO TO WASTE. I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE HIM IN CONCERT IT SHOULD BE A GREAT SHOW. IT GIVES ME SOMETHING TO LOOK FORWARD TO THAT IS FOR SURE. IT WILL ALSO BE NICE TO SPEND TIME WITH MY BROTHER BECAUSE WE NEVER SEEM TO SEE EACH OTHER ANYMORE. SO HOPEFULLY IT WILL ALL HAPPEN AND NOTHING WILL GO WRONG. BUT WITH MY LIFE YOU NEVER KNOW WHAT IS GOING TO HAPPEN FROM HOUR TO HOUR.