The Band

The Band Back Together Project

I am not sure if everyone knows what The Band is and since I recently started volunteering for them I wanted to write a post about it and introduce to what a great site it is.  I have been reading the stories on Band Back Together since it was started in 2010.  It is an amazing place where you can share stories from your own life of just read others stories and comment.  I haven’t shared any stories from my past yet but it is something that I hope I will be able to write about and have posted over there.

I recently joined the site and I am now volunteering and helping out with the site.  I have met some great people through the site and I have also learned so much.  I love to read others stories and take the lessons that they have learned and apply them in my own life.  It is such a safe place for people to go and write their stories because you don’t have to worry about getting rude and/or mean comments.

We all know there are things that we don’t want to share on our own blogs or that we aren’t at a point where we  can share them openly.  I am personally at the stage where I am not willing to share some parts of my past openly but I am going to share them over there because no one will know it is me.

If you have checked out the site yet please go and stop by because everyone needs to hear nice things and it truly does help the people who have submitted a post.   Also if you would like to volunteer send an email to volunteer at bandbacktogether dot com.  You don’t have to worry about a huge time commitment because you don’t have to do tons of things if you don’t have the time.  Right now I spend a like 30 mins or so a day and that is all.  I am hoping in time I can do more but for now 30 mins is what I have and they are happy with that.

Go check out the site and let me know what you think!

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So Creepy

Father’s Day started out like any other Sunday at our house.  I was woken up at about 6:50 or so by my grandparents cat which as I look back on it now should have been my first clue that something wasn’t right.

Anyway back to my story.  I was looking through the Target ad and saw that they had Dr. Pepper on sale so I decided I was going to run over to Target and then come back and work on designs.  As I was getting dressed I heard what sounded like finger nails on the wall under my bed.  The first time I heard it I didn’t think anything of it but when I heard it again I knew that there was something alive under my bed and it wasn’t one of my cats.

I finished getting dressed and then went and told my grandma that I thought there was a mouse or even a bird under my bed.  She came down to my room and started looking under my bed.  I ran to get a flash light and once she turned it on and looked under the bed she saw what was making the noise.

There was a BABY BIRD under my bed and it was very much alive.  Needless to say this immediately freaked me out.  I went and got my grandpa and we started to chase the bird around my room and into my grandparent’s room for the next hour.

Needless to say when we finally caught it my whole room was torn apart and a total mess.  My grandma and I then spent rest of the day cleaning my room and doing laundry since my entire bed had to be moved while we were trying to catch the bird.

Let’s just say I have never had an issue with birds before but now I find them totally creepy and I want nothing to do with them.  I also am going to be sleeping with my door closed because I can’t handle any more critters getting brought into my room!  Oh and it was my grandparents cat Vinnie that brought the bird in because my cats are terrified of birds.

I hope your Father’s Day was tons better than mine!

Digiprove sealCopyright secured by Digiprove © 2012 Margaret Margaret

My Open Adoption Thoughts

I haven’t written anything about adoption in awhile so  today I am going to talk about open adoption and why a totally open adoption isn’t for me.  If you don’t already know open adoption is defined:

Open adoption is an adoption in which the biological mother or parents and adoptive family know the identity of each other. In open adoption, the parental rights of biological parents are terminated, as they are in “closed adoptions” and the adoptive parents become the legal parents, yet the parties elect to remain in contact. Open adoption has become the norm in most states in the adoption of newborns.

Source: Wikipedia

At this point I would consider the adoption of my daughter to be semi open or even almost closed.  I get a card from them on Christmas and if during the year I want to an update I email them and ask for one and I am 100% okay with that.  I know that some people won’t understand why I am okay with so I am going to try and explain it as best as I can.

For the first year I got letters and pictures pretty regularly and to be honest every time I got pictures and a letter it brought back all of the emotions.  Once the letters and pictures stopped coming as regularly and now have pretty much stopped I have found been able to heal and stop living in the past.

Now that isn’t saying that I don’t think of her because I think of her every day but I feel that I am not stuck in the past.  In order for me to heal and get at the place I where I can now talk about it to anyone with out getting depressed I had to put everything that reminded me of her away.  I found that when I had her things out that I was dwelling on the pain and not living my life.

I am so glad that my adoption is how it is because it has allowed me to live my life and heal from the pain.  Now there are still times that it is hard for me but those times are few and far between anymore.

Digiprove sealCopyright secured by Digiprove © 2012 Margaret Margaret

30 Things About My Invisible Illness

I was going through the drafts of posts that I have and I found this questionaire.  I am pretty sure I got this last September during Invisible Illness week and for some reason I never filled it out and posted it.  I figured I would fill it out now and compare it to the one I did a few years ago.  If you want to see the other one click here and it will take you to it.

1. The illness I live with is: Multiple Sclerosis
2. I was diagnosed with it in the year: 2000 or 2001 I believe
3. But I had symptoms since: I was in 5th grade
4. The biggest adjustment I’ve had to make is: Realizing that I have to slow down and pace myself.
5. Most people assume: That nothing is wrong with me and that I am just lazy
6. The hardest part about mornings are: Getting up if I have been up most of the night or if I am in pain
7. My favorite medical TV show is: I don’t really watch any of these since they took Discovery Health off the air in my area.
8. A gadget I couldn’t live without is: My computer & my cell phone calander
9. The hardest part about nights are: Falling asleep and staying asleep.
10. Each day I take __ pills & vitamins. (No comments, please) 7 everyday and then maybe 3 or 4 more depending on pain that I am having.
11. Regarding alternative treatments I: Really want to try acupuncture but I don’t have the money to try it right now.
12. If I had to choose between an invisible illness or visible I would choose: Visible
13. Regarding working and career: I currently work as a receptionist and I also design blogs but I had to quit my job in the medical field because of it.
14. People would be surprised to know:That  my hands are numb and I had to reteach myself to type.
15. The hardest thing to accept about my new reality has been:Knowing that I can’t do the same things other people my age do and also knowing the people get scared off when they find out I have MS
16. Something I never thought I could do with my illness that I did was:I can’t really think of anything.
17. The commercials about my illness:I haven’t really seen any commercials about MS
18. Something I really miss doing since I was diagnosed is:Since I have had it so long I don’t really miss anything because I have been dealing with this for years now.
19. It was really hard to have to give up: It has been hard for me to stop eating gluten because I love bread.  I didn’t find out that I couldn’t eat gluten till about 5 years ago but when I don’t eat it my MS does so much better.
20. A new hobby I have taken up since my diagnosis is: Since I have had MS for so long I haven’t really picked up anything new other than design blogs and blogging.
21. If I could have one day of feeling normal again I would: There isn’t anything I  would do differently than what I do now.
22. My illness has taught me: Is to slow down and enjoy the little moments
23. Want to know a secret? One thing people say that gets under my skin is: “I am sorry” or “That has to be hard”
24. But I love it when people:Don’t judge and take the time to listen and learn about MS.
25. My favorite motto, scripture, quote that gets me through tough times is:“You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have”
26. When someone is diagnosed I’d like to tell them:Do your research because knowledge is power!
27. Something that has surprised me about living with an illness is:How shallow and rude people are and can be.
28. The nicest thing someone did for me when I wasn’t feeling well was:Just be there
29. I’m involved with Invisible Illness Week because:I want everyone to learn about invisible illnesses
30. The fact that you read this list makes me feel:Good because it means that you are willing to learn and you are judging.

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