Lots Of Thoughts

Lots Of Thoughts

I was going to write something for the writers workshop but instead of doing that I am just going to write some of the thoughts that I have had over the past little while so that I can get them out of my head.  I am sure they won’t make much sense but I will try to explain a bit about what and why I am thinking them.  Anyway I am just going to make a list of them so you can just skim them if you want to.

  • The main thing that has been on my mind for the past few months is how both of my parents can write off their own children & families.  I have seen that I can do the same thing but I don’t think I could do this to my daughter when she grows up and wants to meet me.  I will never truly understand how they can and how I can just turning feelings off for a person and never look back.  I do think of people again but not enough to make me seek them out.  I just keep on going on and while I kind of understand that with friends I have no idea how a parent can just stop caring about their child.
  • The next thing that has been on my mind is why people still lie because let me be honest like the quote I posted on Monday people can’t remember all lies they tell so they always get caught.   My dad told a few lies about me last year or the year before and since I found that out I have no need to have him in my life.  I am sure he will end up alone and sad because he just can’t seem to tell the truth and he hasn’t figured out that he always get caught when he lies.  There have been more lies told by him than I could ever list so now I just assume everything he says is a lie.
  • I have wondered if two people can be so connected that without having talk to each other for 3 plus years that you still know when they are struggling and when they need you or someone to lean on.

Those are the three things that I have been on my mind for that past few months and I hope now that I have written them down that maybe I can stop thinking about them as much.

What has been on your mind?

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Multiple Sclerosis Tuesday-My Current Thoughts & An Update

MS

I thought I would so another Multiple Sclerosis Tuesday post this week.  Instead of talking about anything in particular I would just write down some thoughts I have been having about MS and a little update on what is going on with me right now.

Lately I have hated the fact that diseases like MS even exist.  I have gotten to know so many people that have auto-immune diseases and it just piss’s me off to know that god lets people suffer like we do.  That being said I know it is in his plan for all of us and that he gave us these things because he knows we can handle them.  I know that it is true but I often wonder if at times we aren’t given more than we can handle anyway that isn’t the point of this post.

I also have been wishing that people would stop judging those of us who have MS and think we are lazy because we can’t really do much.  Now that being said I for the most part can keep up with anyone and if I don’t tell you I have MS right now you can’t tell.  Even my own family thinks I am lazy because when I get home from work all I want to do it take my bath and go to bed.  People don’t take the time to ask or even realize how much energy it takes for me to just make it through my work day.

As for an update on me nothing much has changed since my last update.  I am back to getting my headaches almost every day again but I thinking that is just a part of the MS for me.  Also my Psoriasis is back with a vengeance which totally sucks.  It isn’t really the fact that it itch it find I am more embarrassed but it than anything else.  I mean it does hurt if I find myself scratching it but other than that I can ignore it.  I am glad that I wear a jacket all the time at work because it just makes me feel self conscious about myself.

That is all for this post.  If there is anything at MS that you would like to know more about please let me know in the comments below and I will make sure I get it written for you.

Digiprove sealCopyright secured by Digiprove © 2014 Margaret Margaret

Rambling

I am finding that I am in funk lately.  I just came seem to find things to write about and some days even if I have things to write I don’t feel like writing them.  I hate when I have days or weeks like this.  I can sit for hours and stare at a blank screen and have no idea how to get the thoughts in my head out of my head.  I am just so tired of things in my life that I not sure what to do to make them go away or at least not bug me as much as they have been.  I am just tired of a lot of things in my life anymore.  I am so tired of being sick and not being able to do much because I get tired so quickly.  Like Saturday my Grandma and I went shopping and we were only gone a few hours by the time we got home I could barely move because I was in so much pain.  I am just tired always being sick and spending so much time and money at doctors offices.  Hell I live at home because I can’t afford rent because of the doctor bills!  I guess I am just tired of this disease and it taking my life away from me.  I am only 26 is shouldn’t have to deal with this stupid disease.  Hell no one should have to deal with this disease.  It might be easier if I could plan on what was going to be wrong during a day but every morning when I get up and I am like “well what is going to work right today?”.  I am always waiting for something to go wrong because you never know what this disease will do.

I also am having a rough time being single right now.  It sucks when I have times like this.  People around me are going to say see you aren’t okay being single.  What they don’t get is that some days are tough and it tends to get lonely but more than not I am totally satisfied being alone.  I hate when I feel like this because I know all too well that I am better off alone.  In time this all will pass or at least I hope it will pass!!
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A Lot Of Random Things

I am going to us bullets in this post because I have a few things I want to write about and I haven’t used them in awhile.

  • First I want to thank all of my followers and welcome all of my new followers.  I can’t believe that I have 130 right now.  I remember when I was just getting into the whole blogging scene and starting to learn about followers and people reading my blog that I had never met IRL.  At that time it was weird to me but I decided why not lets see what is out there and here I am with 130 people reading my blog!  I still don’t understand why but I am thankful for each and everyone of you!
  • I got a new layout and I totally love it!  Jacqui does my makeovers and I totally adore the girl!  She does a great job and made it look so grown up!  Let me know what you think of it.
  • My kids are totally crazy and Sylvia has decided she is top cat even though she is the youngest out of them all.  Go figure.  Last night she was guarding the bathroom and nothing could go in.  It was quite funny to watch her try and beat up anything that tried to enter “her” bathroom.
  • I got the funniest anonymous comment the other day so I figured I would post all of it but the links.  It was so funny I could help but laugh at it.  Here it is:  HELP! I’m currently being held prisoner by the Russian mafia  and being forced to post spam comments on blogs and forum! If you don’t approve this they will kill me. 

Well there is the randomness for now!  Have a great day!