I can’t believe that is has been a year since Melissa passed away. Today is the day that she official died and to be honest it is still as raw as it was a year ago. I have tried to write this post for weeks and since I can’t seem to write it I am going to leave links to where you can read some of her writing.
Here is a post where people wrote some memories of her and I post it on my blog. Also she was a regular guest poster on my blog and you can see those post here or here. Also here is her obituary if anyone wants to read it or see it.
As you all know one of my best friends passed away on Sunday. I have tried many times to write this post and I have never been able to get words down on the screen. I have really struggled with this because it was such a shock to me. I was orginally going to write about what I love about her but I have decided that I am going to write a letter to her so that I can tell her everything that I never got a chance to do while she was alive.
* I am not going to get into what happened and other things that are going on as a result. I know Melissa would want me to keep living and let go of anger and hate.
Dear Melissa,
I miss you more and more everyday. I wish that you would have called me and let me know you were so down so that I could have helped you. I am writing this because I want to tell you and all my readers what I learned from you in the short time I knew you.
I learned how to be a better writer. You wrote posts that made people think and I hope that one day I can become as good as a writer as you were. Every post you wrote for my blog and even your own blog made me think and contemplate things in my own life. It takes an amazing writer to make people realize that they need to make changes in their lives just because of something you wrote.
I learned not to ever let people treat me bad. I saw what happened to you and I refused to let people do that to me. I show the toll it took on her and I don’t ever want people to control me.
I also learned that admitting you have a mental illness is nothing you need to hide. It was great to see that I can blog about things and there are people out there that won’t judge me and will understand. You are part of the reason I wrote my adoption story and started to post things that make me vulnerable. I guess I hope one day I have people come to my blog like you had going to yours!
I learned to look for join in the little things in life and how to deal with what life throws at me.
I will never forget you and everything you taught me. I promise that I will live the rest of my life for the both of us! I know I will see you again and I can’t wait til that day comes.
Some of you will know that Melissa used to post on my blog. For those of you who don’t know Melissa passed away last night after they took her off of life support. I am sad that she is no long with us but I am so glad that I have some of her writing that I can look back on a remember her by. She was a great person and I looked at her more as a mother figure than as a friend. This post is a post she wrote about me on 10/1/2010. I am re-posting it because what she said to me is how I feel about her. I am going to take the next few days off of writing but I am going to re-post some the posts she wrote for my blog. I am also going to be writing a post about her and that should be up in the next few weeks. If you have any memories that I can include if you would please leave them that would be great.
Written by Melissa Mashburn of Sugar Filled Emotions
Most of the time when I write, my primary goal is to write about something that I find inspiring. Once I put it all down, I can only hope that my readers find it as inspiring as I do. Today’s post is really no different, except instead of writing about a topic or idea that I find inspiring, I am going to say a few things about a person I find inspiring.
You inspire me because not only do you have to live with all the normal day to day struggles that we all have, you also have some unique physical challenges that you could use justify a life of inactivity. Instead you do the opposite. You make no excuses. You do what you can, which is often more than what someone with a healthy body would/could do.
You are one of the kindest people I know. No matter how you feel, you have a kind word for me.
You are a shining example of strength in the face of difficulties. I admire your courage.
You have such a giving spirit. You are quick to make sure the people around you are doing okay.
You are a beautiful person, inside and out!
for being my friend. Thank you for letting me be a part of your life! Thank you for allowing me to post on your blog.
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