If you want to see the list of all the prompts you can click here and go to first post. Today’s topic is what is my current relationship. Since it is pretty vague I am going to to write about my marriage. I am not sure how many people know that I am still married or that I have been married at all. My husband told me on Christmas day in 2009 ( I believe it was 2009) that he wanted a divorce and he told me through a text message. The reason we are still married is because I refuse to pay for the divorce because he ran up a credit card that was in our names to almost $11,000 and he expects me to pay it. I also feel that because he left me on Christmas day that he should pay for the divorce.
***This is was originally posted on October 12, 2010. I am going to be re-posting some of my MS posts because I have gotten so many new followers and I want to share them with my new readers.
I found a stat during invisible illness week that really shocked me but in the same sense it made total sense to me. It said that 75% of marriages where one person has a chronic illness end in divorce. I am shocked by this but I also know it is true because I am one of the 75%. When I worked at the nursing home I saw it all to often. Peoples spouses would leave them once they got sick. On the other had I also saw the husbands that stuck around. I was always in awe of the ones that stayed with there spouses.
It makes me sad that people are so shallow that they leave when things are going as they hoped. It hurts me because I was 100% honest with my husband before we got married and once he finally saw that I was sick he left a few months later. I would never leave someone because they are sick. I know there are a few good men out there who leave but more than not they walk away.
The reason I am not dating is because I don’t want to deal with another person getting scared and walking away. Since the MS is basically invisible well at least right now it is people can’t understand that I am sick. Once they do finally see that I am sick they leave because they “can’t” deal with it. I just irritates me that so many people are scared by something that affects me but I can’t change that about people. I know this post is all over the place but it was hard for me to organize my thoughts on this post.
I am going to start by saying that this post turned into arant about things that I haven’t written about before.Now I am sure there will be people who don’tknow the whole situation and will judge me because of what I am going to type.Just let me tell you that what you are aboutto read is mild compared to what he done to me in the course of our marriageand he is reading this then oh well!!!This is my blog if you don’t like it don’t read it!!
So a few weeks ago my husband sent me a message and asked mehow I was doing because he hadn’t heard from me in months.I told him to just leave me alone because Iwasn’t happy with him at all.He thenproceeds to ask why I was mad at him.Itold him because of the credit card.Forthose that don’t know the story of the credit card here it is.While we were married and getting along wegot a credit card for my husband to use instead of taking out cash advancesbecause the credit card had a lower interest rate.After we split up this last time I finallygot them to turn off the card after the total was to almost $11,000.So then we are left to pay off that amountbut he couldn’t charge anymore on the card.We needless to say he pays on it from time to time and up until recentlyI have refused to pay on it because I am not the one who ran it up.Not to mention I have so many doctor billsbecause he took me off of his insurance and didn’t tell me but that is a wholedifferent post.
Anyway back to the credit card.I have been getting calls from the creditcard company because he doesn’t pay it like he should.I have gotten tired of my grandparentsbitching about the credit card company calling all the time so I set uppayments for the next year to shut them up for a year.After the year is done I will figure out howI am going to pay for the rest of it.After I tell him I mad about the credit cardthis is the message he sends me “I paid the credit card in October! “I just sat there with a dumb look on my facebecause of what he said.I didn’trespond then and I still haven’t responded to him.Does he really think that you only have topay bills once a year?????I finallycame to the realization that I can’t argue with someone who is that dumbbecause it is a total waste of my time!
So that is the story of the dumbest thing I have ever hear!
So far this is the easiest topic we have had. The one person I can think of that fits this is my husband. I will regret the fact that I married him forever! It is the worst thing I ever could have done but I had to do it hard way. If I would have listened to my family I never would have had to go through it. I have learned a lot from everything though so in the end it will be okay. Just getting to the okay part is hard right now. I would post a picture of the idiot but it would just piss me off so it is better that I don’t post one.
Today’s topic is easy for me. I need to forgive my parents for leaving me at my parents when I was 8 years old. I know I was better off where I was at but there at still days that it hurts and sucks. I feel like I missed out on a lot of moments that children usually have with their parents. I think what makes it harder for me to forgive my mom is that fact that she doesn’t even seem to care. Hell I took the time to find and contact her and now she acts like she could careless. At least my dad is trying. I am not totally comfortable with it yet but I am working on it and he understands that and is willing to let things go at my pace. So I am working on forgiving him but I truly think I am just going to write my mom off and try to forget about her because she doesn’t seem to care at all about me so why should I let it hurt me anymore.
Now for the writers workshop. This week I chose # 1 which is : If I could do it over again… If I could do anything over again I wouldn’t get married. It has been nothing but a waste of time and huge waste of my money. I can honestly say that it is the worst mistake I have made thus far in my life. I would be so much father with my goals if I had just stayed single and not wasted time on him. He has done nothing but make my life hell the entire 4 years we have been together. So that would have to be the thing I would do over again.
Here is a twitter party that I am going to take part in on Friday. It for those of us that aren’t attending BlogHer. It is being thrown by One Cluttered Brain! Everyone should come and join us! It should be a great time and there will even be giveaways!