A Few Thoughts

Since I have decided to start up support group pages and this blog I have found so many people that have placed for adoption.  For the longest time I have struggled because I haven’t had anyone in my life who placed their child for adoption.  It is so nice now to be able to say something and have other women know how I am feeling and completely understand the ups and downs that come along with placing your child.  They understand that you can me sad and miss your child but that doesn’t mean that you regret your choice.  I know I get sad but I would never change the choice I made to place her with the family who is raising her.  I truly believe that she was meant to for them and that God wants them to be her family! 
For a few months after I had my daughter I did go to a support group that the agency I used had but I got tired of all the drama that some of the girls brought and after I had my daughter it was hard to look at girls who were pregnant and not be jealous of them.  I missed being pregnant because while I was pregnant that means she was still with me and after I had her I went home empty handed.  It is a weird feeling to go to the hospital pregnant and then come home not pregnant and with out a baby.  It is such a weird feeling to say the least.  When they say that you ache for your child they are right.  It is just something inside of you that knows something is missing.  If you haven’t been through it I don’t know that you can completely understand it.  I also hope that most people never have to learn what it feels like.

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One Thing . . .

Mama’s Losin’ It

This week for the writers workshop I am going to write about 1.) If you had to go back to high school, how would you do it differently?

I hated everything about high school because it was pure hell for me but if I could go back and do something again I would have graduated early.   I would have worked my ass off so that I could get away from the bullies and also get a head start on college.  Also my high school had a program where you could take college classes and get credits for high school.  I wish I would have looked more in to that as well because if I had done that I may have finished college and be at a totally different place in my life.  I believe that if I had more college done before I graduated I would have a degree by now.
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A Dad’s Letter To His Daughter

When Mother’s Day arrives, I have so many mixed emotions. My wife says that we shouldn’t say anything to our daughter on Mothers Day, but inside, I didn’t feel that this was right. We thought by not saying anything would spare her the pain on mothers day. Just because she gave her baby up for adoption doesn’t mean that she isn’t a mother, especially after what she went through to bring him into this world. I’m so glad that I found this web site, which I shared with my daughter. It ansered my question. So, with that said, I want to say Happy Mother’s Day to my daughter and to the adoptive mother. You did the right thing, Heather, and one day, you’ll see. The baby is safe, happy and doing well in a great family. You did what’s best for him right now. As a Mother, you made a great first decision for your son. I love you, Heather. 
Stay strong. 
Love, Dad

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Mothers Day

First off I want to say Happy Mothers Day to all the birth mom’s.  We tend to get forgotten on this day but my family usually buys me flowers so that I don’t feel left out.   Below are a few pictures of the flowers that I was given this year:

As most people know I am not a huge fan of Mother’s Day.  I always try and forget that the day even is around.  This year I have done pretty well with forgetting that the day was coming and this year I don’t think will be as bad as the other years have been for me.

I hope that all mom’s and birth moms will have a great day!
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Happy Mother’s Day

I want to wish all the Birth Mothers out there a great Mother’s Day.  People may forget that we are parents but we are!  I hope that your own family’s do something to make you feel special on that day.  I usually get flowers so that helps the day pass for me.  I usually try and stay busy and hope for the day to pass quickly!  I hope you all have a great day!
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