Birth Father

I wanted to do another post in my adoption thoughts series because I haven’t done one in awhile. If you want to read any of my past posts in this series, you can click here to check them out. This post is going to be about how hard this year has been since I

July 7th will mean that eleven years has gone by since I placed my daughter for adoption. I can’t believe it has been that long since I had her. I have found myself thinking more and more about her this year, and I think that is because I had to put Alley Cat to sleep earlier this year.

I have always said that Alley was my replacement baby, and now that she is gone I can’t stop being taken back eleven years. There are some days that it seems like it all just happened a few days ago. I can still remember all the feelings and how I felt the moment I handed her off to her parents.

I feel like I just can’t wait for this year just to be over so that I won’t have to think about it anymore. Even as I type that, I know that just because her birthday passes it won’t just go away. I know that only time will make it not hurt as much, and I hate waiting for time to pass because it seems to take forever.

There isn’t anything that I want to say other than that I am struggling with everything this year. I just want to go to sleep and not wake up until the middle of July. I know that it won’t make it better or make it hurt less, but I hope that by getting the thoughts out of my head and written down will help me deal with it all. That is all I have to say, and I am hoping to have another post about adoption up on her birthday.

*I did write a post earlier this year about saying goodbye to Alley so if you want to check that out, you can click here to read that post.

I haven’t written about adoption in a long time because I never had the time to sit down and write anything other than a book review. Since things have pretty much slowed down for me at work right now, I wanted just to write about one of the thoughts I have had for awhile because I keep hearing stories about it in the news.

It seems like every time I turn around I am hearing about mothers placing baby’s for adoption and not telling the fathers what they are doing. It makes me sad because then those of us who followed all the steps including having the birth father sign away their rights are looked at like we might have done the same thing.

When I placed my daughter, I had no option but to have him sign away his rights because he was in the military and had to for me to place. I do know that some girls I knew through a support group I attend had the fathers of their child sign the papers as well just so that they didn’t have to worry about something like this happening.

I have to wonder if the birth father was okay with it until his family decided that they weren’t. I could be wrong but at times, that is what it seems like when you see the stories. I am sure there are cases where the birth fathers honestly didn’t know, and I feel terrible for them because no one should have that done to them. In the end, though everyone ends up getting hurt most of the time the child truly suffers because they don’t understand what is going on.

In the end, though everyone ends up getting hurt most of the time the child truly experiences because they don’t understand what is going on. They have no idea why they are taken away from all they have known and being given to strangers. I am aware that we have no way of knowing how this will affect them later in life or things like that.

I just truly feel bad for everyone involved and I hope that people can figure out a way to stuff like this to not happen anymore. Those are just a few of the thoughts I have been having, and I am wondering what you think about it and if you have any ideas as to how it could be changed?

The World As I See It

Adoption Thoughts- A Hard Year

*I did write a post earlier this year about saying goodbye to Alley so if you want to check that out, you can click here to read that post.

Adoption Thoughts-Birth Father’s Rights